Me, The Black Arts And Grocery Stores

When I was a kid I wanted to be a magician for two specific reasons.

Reason #1

I wanted to raise the dead.

I wasn’t picky about the who or what I wanted to dig up and reanimate. I just wanted to see a bunch of rotting corpses chase people around the supermarket. For my own special reasons I’ve long since forgotten raising the dead and turning them loose in the canned good aisles made perfect sense to me.

Reason #2

I wanted to learn hypnosis so that I could make people  cackle like chickens. Of course, I wanted them to stay that way which is probably the reason every time I used to cut those ads out for those hypnosis kits and tried to mail them off my Mom used to pull them out of our mailbox.

It’s not like I told her my grand plan, but she was my Mom so she probably knew where I was going with that.

Now that I am all grown up, fact is I’m getting old- I’ve given up my dreams of Magic and now days forcing the dead from their nice quiet graves seems pretty rude- so I’m over that.


Over it.


So I’m just wondering about Ventriloquism- I wonder if some of those stories about some ventriloquists  going bonkers because their dummies are demons from Hell are  true….juuusttt wondering

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